My Home

As I left work today, a wave of emotion swept over me. At first I chalked it up to my tendency to be sentimental, seeing as how today was the last day of our summer program, but as I drove away I realized there was more to it than that. It was the fact that it was the end. The end of the routine I had grown accustomed to for 3 months. The end of seeing certain faces everyday. Sure, I will see some of those faces again, but the group of kids won't be the same. I dealt with the same sinking feeling when I moved from Grants Pass to Paris for two years and once again when I left to come back to Grants Pass. And I do realize that we live in a world filled with twists, turns, and transitions, and that my resistance to change may seem silly to you, but I find security in consistency. I joke sometimes to my friends that I could wake up and do the same thing everyday and be perfectly content. But in the midst of feeling sad tonight about my changing circumstances, the Lord wanted to remind of His constant nature. He never changes. He never leaves or forsakes me. And he is the one thing that will remain. Goodbyes are always hard because no matter how long you prolong the final embrace, at some point you have to let go and walk away. I've experienced that moment many times, and every time, the Lord is there to walk away with me. Not only does He walk with me, but sustains and upholds me in the places He's leading me to. And tonight, as I left work, the tears filling my eyes reminded me of my proclivity to forget that. But the upside is that it was also an opportunity to be led back into the loving arms of my Heavenly Father. And they are arms who's embrace I never have to leave. God is my refuge. He is my friend that sticks closer than a brother. He is my home.