I am embraced.

I was reading the story of the lady who was sick and was seeking out Jesus for healing. She had already told herself that if she could just touch his cloak she would be healed. So while Jesus and His disciples were on their way to heal someone else, she came up behind Him and touched His cloak. Jesus turned to her and said, "Take heart, daughter, your faith has healed you." And she was healed. I can identify with this woman in so many ways. So many times I have found myself seeking out the Lord in need. I'll come trembling in fear behind Him, barely touch His cloak then scram, hoping that my brokenness went unnoticed. Yet every time I seek Him out, He notices. He doesn't flinch at my touch. He doesn't pull away in disgust. He doesn't reject me.  He sees me. He acknowledges me. He affirms me. He embraces me. He heals me. He looks at me with love. And no matter how many times, I've experienced God's loving embrace, I still tremble when He holds me, I hesitate to make eye contact with Him, I doubt that His grace is unending, and I fear His rejection. Not because of anything He's ever done. But because I've based God's love for me on my circumstances, and my relationships with others. I equate man's inability to unconditionally love to God's love for me. As it says in 1 Corinthians 13, I've been peering through this mist, unable to get a clear picture of God's true heart. I squint through the fog of rejection, I stumble over lies whispered in the loneliness, and lose heart while looking through the lenses of hurt. I grow tired waiting for the fog to clear, succumb to the mist, and forget the sun ever existed. But just as the woman came to Jesus and was fully embraced, I can come to Jesus and be fully embraced as well. We do not lose heart because God has lost His heart for us, we lose heart because we see through the lenses of this world and all the brokenness it entails. My prayer is that we will know and experience the love God has for us, that we will stop tripping over each other and the imperfect way we love, and allow time for the fog to clear so that the Son can shine all the clearer. My prayer is that we will all know that we are deeply loved by a Heavenly Father that never mess ups.